Hey angels it’s me again talking some personal real life topics.
If you’ve read my previous blog posts discussing medication, then you’ll know I’m currently taking a medication called “Sertaline” – if you’re new here & this is your first time reading one of my posts I promise they’re not all this factual.
I can be funny at the best of times!
Sertraline is a type of antidepressant known as a selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor (SSRI).
Simple as the above really!
If you do want to know more about this…then feel free to read this post which will help expand your knowledge if you’re unfamiliar like I was a while back!
Anyway besides the joking and all that lovely stuff, I wanted to do an almost half a year update on how I’ve been getting on with my medication! Wow how quick has that come around.
I’m going to bullet point as it will be easier to address which situations I have now overcome:
The pros of Sertraline:
• I can now go in a shop alone without a melt down (yay).
• I’m feeling confident to travel to London etc alone & do my thing! (Bigger yay).
• I have cut my panic attacks down to almost 1/2 a month! (Compared to what feels like I use to have 100 a month).
• I can now pursue in what I enjoy without rejecting it because I’d rather not have a meltdown (e.g blogging, meeting friends or seeing family).
• I have my confidence back for the first time in as long as I can remember – I won’t get too cocky I have only some confidence back.
• I can happily wake up in the morning without feeling sheer severe panic in my chest.
• I actually want to get up most mornings now and not hide away hoping to get sucked into a hole.
• I feel like a conquer anything now and not worry as much.
• I don’t feel half as guilty now for having a lazy day.
• I’m not as sensitive as I use to be – back in school if someone laughed at my hairstyle or whatever I would generally go home and think it was the worse thing in the world questioning why why why?!
There are so many other little pros I have noticed in the past 5 months, that have just made me think wow I can actually live what feels like a “panic free” life!
Don’t get me wrong I still panic as much as the next person, possibly more which isn’t healthy…but the severity of the panic I use to suffer with before was horrific to the point where I would just breakdown wherever I was.
If you would like a laugh read this blog post – that’s right I got carried out of v festival crowd because I had a panic attack – I repeat crowd surfed!!! ***dying over here of the embarrassment***
However there are the cons to everything right?
The cons of Sertraline:
• I feel emotionless most the time lol – it now takes me a lot to cry (I use to cry over everything nearly every day).
• The size effects made it feel not worth continuing with because I legit thought I was going to die at first (they’re different for everyone).
• I gained some water weight (horrible side effect) but it’s not actually the end of the world because I feel more healthy and it’s the smallest amount I’ve noticed. Considering I’m a size 4/6 and have been most my teenage life, I’ve always been in a battle of feeling “too skinny”!
• I am now addicted – god I feel weird saying that lol…but yup if I decided not to take that teeny tablet for the next three nights I would get withdrawal symptoms, become sick I’m assuming – so when the time is right I will have to ween off them!
• They make you have dreadful nightmares – I cannot remember the last night I’ve not woken up like WTF was that dream about.
• I feel depressed quite a lot still – this obviously is meant to help this but don’t get me wrong I will go through days or weeks just feeling utter lifeless.
I suppose by reading this back the cons are outweighing the pros, but I promise you from my experience so far they have changed my life for the better?! Weird I know!
I want these type of personal blogs posts to help another individual going through the same thing or even if you know someone and want to educated a-bit more on the topic?!
It’s me sharing my journey with you – I want to be able to help! Because I would have dreamt of something like this when I was struggling for all the years…searching for that one little bit of real advice not just a doctors who has studied about it!
I needed someone who had lived it!
My inbox is always open and I am always here for anyone who need be.
Until next time.